Wednesday, March 7, 2007

New Technology Wednesday

After 10 years of development, Motorola is announcing the release of thier DynaTac 8000X. Thanks to this “cellular” technology, I, master of the universe, will be able to conduct business as if I am in my office, regardless of my physical location.

This includes, but is not limited to, seedy hour-rate motels, strip clubs, casinos, and of course confession. It also gives me the ability to give my “cell” number out to potential night callers, all the while my wife will be none the wiser of my pending infidelities. I can increase my risk for STD’s and other hooker related problems for the low, low price of $3995. Gotta love technology.

Other key benefits of this gem are an outstanding 35 minute talk time with a minimal required 10 hour recharge. The phone can store nicely in my fanny-pack, as it is only 10 inches high (that is 2 inches short of a foot), and weighs in at just under 30oz. I will be able to easily carry my Sony brand Walkman and the phone in one hand at the same time!

Send me your number, I will call you; I just have to keep it short, the calls cost me in the neighborhood of $10 a minute.

Buy your own brick phone. It is guaranteed to get you at least three – “is that a brick phone in your pocket, or are you just happy to meet me?” questions per night.

[RetroBrick]

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