Thursday, April 26, 2007

John Oates Biography 1.0

Mr. Oates arrived here in Osh Kosh on a dancing scholarship. Modern interpretive dance, which is crappy. Rare video footage of John Oates as a child (when he could dance better):

Wednesday, April 25, 2007

Danger, bionic cars ahead.

I have seen a lot of meaningless, stupid road signs in my day; but how people can continue to drive without seeing signs like this?

What do you think it is saying? I am going with, Danger, bionic cars with an impatience for peeing airplanes ahead.

Wednesday, April 18, 2007

If you take my iPod, I take your left ear!

When Royal Mail employees had the opportunity to increase productivity, they took it. Faced upon a board of stiff English men, and even stiffer English men look-a-like women, they were asked what it would take to get them to work just a wee bit harder. Of course, like most of us trying to get a new iPod, they suggested, well an iPod. Something to keep there minds busy while sorting through thousands of pieces of mail a day.

The result is, well, not surprising. I know I've seen it, and you as well... somebody that you work with always manages to fuck things up. Just a mental note, next time you are listening to the Brittney Spears remake of 'Opps... I did it again,' don't go running up to your boss, shoving your earbuds in their fat little head making them listen. Also, please don't sing out loud, especially the line that goes 'I'm not that.....' and that's where I stop.

I know that you are sitting at work, and I have respect for that. I don't want you to lose your iPod, let alone your computer. How would you make it through the day without continually checking

But staff are furious, and one worker, who did not wish to be named, said: "We're up in arms about the destruction of our beloved communal iPod."

Well no shit you are! The keywords here are "Beloved Communal iPod" I hope that we can use this as an example, please keep your mouth shut and don't sing out loud at work, and please keep the crappy Brittney Spears circa 2001 remakes at your house and off your damn "beloved communal iPod"

Here's the rest of the story

Hand Signals

Please follow this link to learn more about hand signals in today's military.

Saturday, April 14, 2007

Real Estate Enthusiasts

This may be the best Real Estate deal on the market now... many small business owners search and dream of a home like this, one that needs absolutely no upgrades and is ready to move in upon purchase.

For Sale by Owner:

Large Eastern Tennessee bungalow fully loaded with upgrades! Four bedroom, four bath completely equipped with a refrigerator in every room. 2500 sq/ft of usable space, however lots of room to "grow." Great for the small business owner this home has multiple offices, with plenty of circulation. Basement has been partially finished, with adequate lighting and air circulation, as well as plumbing installed for even the most serious hydro fanatics. Serious buyers only, we have been "burned" before. Please click here to see the attached pictures.

Monday, April 9, 2007

Pancho Villa's Biography 1.0

How did Pancho Villa actually end up in Osh Kosh? Watch this video to find out more:

Thursday, April 5, 2007

The smell of spring is in the air.

Here in Osh Kosh, we know it is spring when the snow starts to melt away, reveling something fresh and new. We love it because it gives us a chance to find all of the things we mistakenly dropped while wandering into the house wasted off of winter love. Things like our car keys, house keys, and our good friends Dave Wannstache and MagnumPI who thankfully were passed out cold for a good part of the winter. There is nothing better than to start locking your house again, and unfortunately for the homeless man, Tom, living in my shed, he knows spring is his time to pack up and head back to St. Paul.

The most enjoyable part of spring however is getting started on all of home repairs, additions and spring cleaning that takes place in the first part of April. Fixing holes that were punched in the walls and replacing the toilet that some guy passed out on shattering the tank while he was drinking keg beer and popping Valium. A lot of people may ask, why do you feel like you have to get this done so soon in the spring? There is only one simple answer, Girls Gone Wild Tour! Well not really, that was last year and it wasn't everything Apple Vacations said it would be. No, this year I have a much more educational vacation planned, and I managed to get the idea from a very brilliant man. A visionary if you will. I encourage you to read this story, and find an adventure of your own this summer.

Wednesday, April 4, 2007

Hard Bitches

Watch this video to see some of the roughest, toughest, meanest women in the United States today: